When I was in my early teens, my best friend told me about a book she was reading that she couldn’t stop thinking about. She filled me in on the story and naturally, as best friends, soon we were both close to obsessed. We traded it back and forth, and I would browse through the pages whenever she left the book for me to catch up. This went on for months.

But, while both of us were spellbound, only one of us was completely terrified — me. The book was Stephen King’s It, and I could only take on a few pages at once. My friend had to read ahead and give me summaries of her favorite scenes, because I never quite managed to read the whole thing. I knew the story largely through her.

At the time, you might think I was just a scared little kid. But even now, as an adult, creepy or frightening stories still affect me deeply. Except, now I know it’s because I am a highly sensitive person (HSP).

But here’s the thing: I was spellbound. I keep on reading (and watching) creepy stories anyway.

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Why HSPs Usually Avoid Horror and Suspense

I’ve always had a vivid imagination, and I’ve always been more disturbed by sad or scary stories and events than most of my peers. As a kid, this left me feeling alienated or “wrong,” especially compared to my friends.

Only recently did I discover that I’m a highly sensitive person and what that means. Being an HSP makes me more sensitive to sensory stimuli. It’s why I process things deeply, and — most importantly — why I feel things deeply, too.

Suddenly it makes sense that my friend could enjoy the thrill of Stephen King while It left me with nightmares for years. (It’s also at least partially to blame for my fear of clowns.)

So you’d think I might avoid strong stimuli, and most of the time, I do. I prefer online shopping to the mall; small gatherings to big parties; unscented to scented anything. Yet the creepy and the thrilling hold an irresistible fascination for me.

I’m Drawn to Disturbing Stories Even Though I’m Highly Sensitive

To be clear: Not gore! I don’t do the stuff with graphic images that make you scream. Like most HSPs, I have a hard time with violent imagery, even if it’s fictional. What fascinates me is the stuff that gives you the chills, gives you goosebumps, makes your hair stand up at the back of your neck. The disquieting.

It calls to me, and it’s a call I can’t refuse.

Why do I do this to myself as an HSP? In my defense, I do stick to the more sophisticated stuff. As a result of being highly intuitive and perceptive, HSPs have strong “bullshit-detectors;” I get very annoyed when a story doesn’t add up. Instead of horror movies (which I think are not just overwhelming, but usually pretty dumb), I watch thrillers or mysteries when I want a couple of nights of bad sleep.

The Shining? An excellent movie by my favorite director, the brilliant Stanley Kubrick. I don’t even dare to google it out of fear what images might come up, yet how could I say no (it ruined hotel hallways for me forever!)?

And I had to read Bram Stoker’s Dracula. Yes, my dog had to sleep in my room with me the entire time, but I devoured it anyway.

Paranormal events, ghost stories, twisted characters: I know I shouldn’t read about them, not listen to the stories, look away. I know it’s bad for me, will give me nightmares, anxiety, make me jump at shadows (HSPs are jumpy!). But I’m forever hooked.

So, how am I dealing with my “guilty pleasure” as someone who’s affected by everything so deeply? Luckily, over the years and through learning more about high sensitivity, I was able to develop strategies to help me process disquieting information when I seek it out (this is an important distinction!) without damage to my mental wellbeing. Here are my tips for fellow HSPs with a fascination for the creepy:

How to Enjoy Scary Movies When You’re Highly Sensitive

1. Keep it light (literally)

This is obvious, but essential: Don’t consume creepy content in the dark. Turn on all the lights you will need later — this will save you unnerving trips to the next light switch.

And don’t be embarrassed to invest in a soothing nightlight (something with a warm glow) for your bedroom to keep your vivid HSP imagination from running wild.

2. Comic relief

Many HSPs absorb moods and emotions in their environment, especially if they are empaths, and that means themes from a story can soak in and stay in our heads all night (or longer).

But you can also use that to your advantage. Dissolve the tension by either making fun of what’s going on on-screen or by watching or reading something goofy and up-beat afterwards. This is very powerful — it’s like a light switch for your mood.

3. Don’t go it alone

No matter how old you are, make sure you don’t have to walk home alone from your the viewing party or movie theater. If possible, have someone else around the night that you watch or read something scary. Someone to cuddle up to is best.

If no human is available, letting your pet sleep with you can be very calming, too.

4. Be skeptical

This is where the HSP brain’s tendency to seek answers or overthink comes in handy! Don’t just accept what’s presented to you as fact. Even if you’re dealing with fictional content, activate your critical thinking. Once you analyze a story, the “inexplicable” will seem less mysterious, and therefore less scary.

5. Be compassionate, even toward monsters

Why not use another HSP superpower, empathy, and switch perspective? This may seem a bit silly, but it works: Try to put yourself in the shoes of what scares you. It must be lonely to be a ghost. Maybe that’s why they’re trying to contact people? Or, what if they want to go to heaven, but they don’t know how, and are looking for help? As your compassion grows, your fear will shrink.

Need to Calm Your Sensitive Nervous System? 

HSPs often live with high levels of anxiety, sensory overload and stress — and negative emotions can overwhelm us. But what if you could finally feel calm instead?

That’s what you’ll find in this powerful online course by Julie Bjelland, one of the top HSP therapists in the world. You’ll learn to turn off the racing thoughts, end emotional flooding, eliminate sensory overload, and finally make space for your sensitive gifts to shine.

Stop feeling held back and start to feel confident you can handle anything. Check out this “HSP Toolbox” and start making a change today. Click here to learn more.

6. Get knowledgeable

Just like compassion, knowledge will help you feel in control of your nerves. If you are into true crime, check your local police department — many departments offer safety education or even self-defense classes. (This will also up your critical thinking, since you’ll know when a scenario in a movie is completely unrealistic.) If you’re fascinated by the paranormal, find scientific publications from sophisticated sources on the topic — the kind that explain the brain glitches that make us experience ghosts, or the cognitive biases behind superstitions.

As human beings, we are afraid of the unknown. Educating yourself will empower you.

7. Quit when you need to

As an HSP, you’re genetically designed to react more strongly to stimuli. Therefore, you should never feel obligated to “go through with” a story or a movie. When it makes you too uncomfortable, stop — even if you are at the movies with a group of friends. No one should expect you to be sick to your stomach just to stay with the group. (If you have a hard time saying no, read this.)

Remember, your sensitivity is an asset, not a flaw, and you have to respect your gift.

8. Pray

Don’t let sinister feelings linger. Bring peace to your mind according to your belief system. Say a prayer when you feel uneasy. Put up a crucifix if it makes you feel safe. Burn some sage. Or even take a shower (unless you just watched Psycho!). The point is to ground yourself — whatever helps you to chase that dark mood away. You’ll feel lighter instantly.

The more self-aware you are of your needs and limits, the better you will be able to actually enjoy your spooky streak. And remember, as Morticia Addams said:

“Normal is an illusion. What’s normal for the spider is chaos for the fly.”

You might like:

• Sensitive to Violent or Scary Movies? You’re Not Alone
• How to Explain High Sensitivity to People Who Don’t ‘Get’ It
• These 3 Sets of Genes Make You a Highly Sensitive Person

The post How to Survive Scary Stories as a Highly Sensitive Person appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.

Highly sensitive people (HSPs) feel the world deeply. Many are spiritual, the majority are introverted, and all need plenty of downtime to recharge. (Are you a highly sensitive person? Learn about the signs here.) 

But we live in a materialistic, productivity-obsessed culture that isn’t always ideal for HSPs. Mindful and perceptive qualities often don’t get the appreciation they deserve. As a result, being sensitive is — wrongfully — equated with having nothing to say. And, worst of all, kindness is often taken for weakness. 

Many HSPs have experience being taken advantage of, so they may frequently end up feeling underrated, misunderstood, or isolated. Under these circumstances, it’s tempting and oh-so-easy to decide that the world has wronged you and to withdraw into a web of self-pity. But as Star Wars fans know: “Fear is the path to the dark side. Fear leads to anger. Anger leads to hate. Hate leads to suffering.” It’s a waste of your gifts to shut down out of fear of failure and rejection. 

Yes, being an HSP can be challenging, but we are quietly strong. And that strength doesn’t mean suppressing your emotions and strangling your sensitivity. It’s therefore important to learn what I like to call “HSP self-defense” in order to avoid falling into the HSP victim trap. Here are seven ways that have helped me.  

7 Tips for HSP “Self-Defense”

1. Learn all about being an HSP.

Your first step of self-defense is self-knowledge and self-appreciation. Being highly sensitive is not always easy, but it is a superpower. (Know any superheroes whose life is easy? Me neither.)

We notice more than the average person. Superpower! We have a built-in bullshit detector. Superpower! We are creative, intuitive, and emotionally intelligent. Superpower, superpower, superpower! 

Thanks to our gifts, HSPs are natural-born leaders, artists, and healers. The more you learn about being highly sensitive, the more you’ll realize that what some “muggles” may perceive as weakness actually gives you a leg up! Work on your strengths and honor your needs as an HSP. You’ll emerge stronger and happier.  

2. Refuse to be an “emotional trash can.”

HSPs are deeply empathetic, and some are actual empaths. This means we can absorb other people’s emotions and sense their needs. This ability (oh hey there superpower!) often causes us to become people-pleasers and at times even martyrs because we crave an atmosphere of peace and harmony. 

But guess what? That you can sense people’s needs doesn’t mean you have to cater to them! Yes, really! Nix the savior-complex. You’re not everyone’s support system/life coach/therapist. You have your own stuff going on. 

This isn’t being selfish, this is you refusing to be a trash can for other people’s emotions and letting so-called energy vampires suck you dry. If you’re constantly exhausted by trying to meet everyone’s expectations (and who wouldn’t be!) and other people’s bad vibes keep getting you down, it’s time for some serious “psychic self-defense.” Dig deep, center yourself, and make a conscious decision to stop being so available to everyone’s emotional needs. 

3. Boundaries, boundaries, boundaries

Speaking of being available, your self-worth and mental health will benefit immensely once you start setting boundaries. You need to treat your mental health as something sacred if you want a good quality of life. Protect it at all costs. 

Your time and energy are your most valuable resources — spend them wisely. Family and close friends, the kind of people who respect you and are there for you when you need them, should be your priority. Don’t get “sucked into” random people’s drama. And keep people who drain you at arm’s length, even if they are family. 

If someone ends up taking advantage of your kindness, start saying no. They won’t get better, but you will only get worse. Any type of close relationship should be a source of strength for both sides. If someone exhausts you with constant neediness or negativity, it’s time to take a step back and examine the balance of giving and taking. It may be a good idea to distance yourself. Remember, this isn’t being selfish, this is self-defense! Save your energy for the right people. If you can’t turn your back on someone completely, choose to start loving them from a (physical and emotional) distance.

4. As Mr. Rogers said, “Look for the helpers.”  

For sensitive souls, the many sad and cruel events in the world can be a source of great distress. Sadly, in many cases there’s nothing you can do, but it doesn’t help anyone if you’re carrying the weight of the world. So should you just turn a cold shoulder instead? Of course not (we HSPs can’t anyway). 

There’s a healthy alternative to either falling emotionally apart or closing off your heart. You can take back your power by getting active where you can actually make a difference. Identify your area of responsibility, then focus on that. For instance: You may not be able to help street dogs in India, but what you can do is volunteer at your local shelter and help animals in your neighborhood. This will be your area of responsibility. This is what you can do. 

You can’t avoid being saddened by suffering, but you don’t have to dwell on it. Shift your focus to what you can do.

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5. Know where your responsibility begins and ends.

Because HSPs are such great helpers, we can find ourselves taken advantage of. If this happens, it’s important to remember that kindness is a strength, not a weakness. It’s not your fault if people wrong you. You are not responsible for their actions. Your reactions, however, are your responsibility. 

Are you allowing them to make you bitter and resentful? Are you letting them fool you twice? Or are you able to acknowledge that a certain person wasn’t worth your kindness and move on? Acknowledging what is and isn’t your responsibility will give you back power in any social interaction. 

If you’re nothing but helpful and friendly, but your coworker keeps being grumpy, that’s their problem, not yours. Keep your positive attitude, but don’t waste any time feeling responsible for their bad mood and trying to “fix” it..

6. Manage your emotions.

To be able to experience emotions deeply is a strength, but that’s not to say you can go around emoting all the time. Crying at the movie theater is just fine; crying at work, however, not (always) so much. For some settings, it’s a good idea to cultivate a bit of a poker face. You can still acknowledge your feelings without sharing them with everybody around you. Strong emotional reactions don’t make you weak, but it’s also a strength to learn how and when to control your outbursts. 

Identify and process your emotions in a constructive manner. Let’s say you’re upset about an insensitive comment from your boss. Instead of bursting into tears, try to analyze the comment. Why does it upset you? Is it because your boss seems to have the wrong impression of you? Is there something you can do to correct this impression? Or is your boss simply stressed by something out of your control and the comment didn’t really have anything to do with you? 

Also, learn to distinguish where any emotional overload is coming from. Is it situational or permanent? Are you momentarily overwhelmed because you need to withdraw from stimuli like noises and people (and all their “stuff”), or is the matter more serious? High sensitivity is not a mental illness, but it can often go hand in hand with anxiety or depression. In this case, you are not being “too sensitive,” but may need to find professional help to get back on your feet.

7. Connect with other HSPs

Feeling misunderstood is an issue for many HSPs. People who share our traits and have the same wavelength make us feel understood and stronger. There’s power in representation! Many HSPs are drawn to the arts, spirituality, or helping those in need. Any related organizations are a good starting point for looking for kindred spirits. Find your tribe, even if it’s only online. Let a feeling of community and belonging lift you up.

As you learn to build your self-dense as an HSP, there will be ups and downs. Please remember that being strong should never involve tamping down your emotions, pretending to be someone you’re not, and killing off your sensitivity. 

It means knowing more about yourself, your needs, and your worth. It means tapping into your sensitivity when it serves you (not only others). It means saying “no” when you need to. Life is seldom fair and the world isn’t always a friendly place. Being a strong HSP means staying kind and seeing the world’s beauty, but making sure we protect the precious gift we each have. The world would be a sad place without it.

You might like:

• How to Actually Set Better Boundaries as an HSP
• Why Ending a Friendship Overwhelms Highly Sensitive People
• The Link Between High Sensitivity, Empathy, and Codependency

The post How Not to Fall into the Victim Trap as an HSP appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.

Highly sensitive people are animal whisperers, and what a spiritual experience it is to connect so deeply with another life form, to see the world through different eyes, and to feel part of the web of life that surrounds us all. I believe two of the most beautiful and rewarding traits of HSPs are our compassion and our special bond with animals. Here’s why.

We Help Snails Cross the Road

Personally, I live with two rescue dogs. Because I’m an HSP, this is hardly surprising. “Regular” people may shake their heads in disbelief about our “eccentric” behavior, but we put worms back in the grass, help snails cross the road, are deeply moved by the beauty of birds and butterflies and, of course, talk to our pets as if they were fellow humans. I know I do!

Growing up, I was always aware of the moods and needs of our family pets. I would even wake up in the middle of the night if one of them wasn’t feeling well, something I could sense even in my sleep. I was surprised when I realized that not everyone could read their pets like I could. I didn’t know this ability was one of the gifts of being an HSP.

How does the HSP do this? We’re extra-sensitive to all external stimuli. This makes us excellent at perceiving and “translating” non-verbal cues, such as body language. We easily pick up the energy or “vibe” of a living being or place. Yes, being an HSP really is a superpower!

We Must Help Animals in Distress

And if we sense a living being is in distress, we want to, have to, help — because we know we can make a difference. As Dr. Elaine Aron, author of The Highly Sensitive Person, writes, “Because we can notice the subtle signs they give, we understand them better than others, and that puts us in a unique position to help them.”

While feeling animals’ feelings, which can include distress, can be painful, Dr. Aron points out that we should see our close bond with them not as a burden, but as a source of pride and joy.

Why Our Bond With Animals Is So Rewarding

Not only is it cool to have the animal whispering superpower and a deep spiritual connection to all forms of life, our bond with animals comes with a number of additional benefits. Here are seven reasons why the close bond between HSPs and animals is so rewarding:

1. We get companionship without the B.S. (unless your companions are cattle…)

Social interactions can be exhausting for HSPs. We’re easily overstimulated and practically allergic to trivial conversations or negativity. With animals, however, we can enjoy companionship without following social conventions like small talk or white lies.

Animals are straight-forward and accept us the way we are. They understand our sensitivity and even appreciate it. Like us, they sense when people aren’t honest and can’t stand too much stimulation. They are kindred spirits.

Around animals, we can relax and just be ourselves. While people tend to drain us, animals actually help us recharge.

2. Animals are wonderful teachers.

Unconditional love, genuineness, pure joy — there is so much we can learn from animals, and HSPs are open to really listening. Animals are happy to teach those they sense are open to them. The better we learn to listen, the more we will hear. Dr. Aron writes, “If you take the time to observe and communicate, your sensitivity will be sharpened in this important domain.”

Animals accept the things they cannot change and are amazingly resilient. They don’t get caught up in “what if’s.” They do not dwell on the past or worry about the future. They teach us to live in the moment. For HSPs, who may overthink or easily become anxious, this is a valuable lesson.

3. Our bond with animals allows us to experience the world from different perspectives.

Thanks to our enhanced empathy, HSPs are easily able to see the world through the eyes of their animal friends. The more we learn about how animals see the world, the more “doors of perception” we’re opening for ourselves.

What does the world look like for a cat? A horse? A bee? By considering these sometimes radically different perspectives, we expand our minds, potentially indefinitely. By taking our animal friends’ perspective into consideration, we also practice mindfulness, which brings peace to our often frazzled souls. At the same time, this mindfulness helps us practice patience and compassionate leadership. Both qualities are big assets for our personal and professional development.

4. It opens up career opportunities.

While not all animal-related professions are suitable for HSPs (veterinarians, for instance, encounter many sad situations), our deep bond with animals opens up many career opportunities, such as being an animal behaviorist, dog trainer, or even a pet sitter. HSPs tend to excel in careers and jobs like these, because our understanding of animals and our ability to communicate with them on a deeper level can help make us one of the best in our field.

5. It can lead to a healthier lifestyle.

The health benefits of spending time in nature and being around animals are well known. Whether we hike with our dog, ride a horse, or bird watch, time spent in nature remedies the sensual overload, stress, and anxiety HSPs often experience. In addition, our kinship with animals may lead to healthier diet choices, as we may feel inspired by our furry companions to avoid animal products from factory farms or give up meat altogether.

6. We can spot animals in the wild better than others can.

Being sensitive to animals also means we notice them more than other people. I’ve recently taken up photography again, and my love for and awareness of animals has gifted me with some beautiful motifs. Others may just walk by the tiny frog in the grass or fail to notice the deep blue dragonfly on the soft pink flower, but we do! As a special bonus, many animals pick up on our love and respect for them and let us get closer than the “muggles.” Isn’t that magical?

Like what you’re reading? Get our newsletter just for HSPs. One email, every Friday. Click here to subscribe!

7. We can make a difference for animals and our planet.

HSPs can be a voice for animals and the planet. Animal experts Dr. Jane Goodall and Dr. Temple Grandin, for instance, may or may not be HSPs (Grandin is autistic, which helps her connect with animals), but both are truly inspiring in how they use their understanding of animals to improve their welfare. For HSPs, who are always looking for meaningful activities, our bond with and understanding of animals is an opportunity to be their ambassadors — and to make a difference.

HSPs, do you have a special bond with animals? Are you an animal lover? Let me know your thoughts in the comments.

You might like:

• What It’s Like Growing Up as a Highly Sensitive Child in a Chaotic Home
• 19 Habits of Highly Sensitive People
• 13 Signs That You’re an Empath

The post Highly Sensitive People Have a Special Bond With Animals appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.

Of course, pregnancy is rarely a walk in the park (for most of us, Amy Schumer’s pregnancy is a lot more relatable than Meghan Markle’s). But for HSPs, having a baby brings some additional challenges — and they’re things that no book prepares you for. 

Let’s take a look at the challenges of being pregnant for highly sensitive women, and how you can go in prepared. 

How Pregnancy Changes Your High Sensitivity

Some of the challenges that pregnancy brings — and the ways high sensitivity affects that — can be unexpected. For example:

Yes, your sensitivity goes through the roof.

Are you, like most HSPs, sensitive to smells? Congratulations! It will get so much worse when you’re pregnant. Had I been in better physical shape, I could have easily worked as a bloodhound during my pregnancy. A few examples: Someone has been smoking on my street? I still smell it hours later — and get nauseated to the point of cursing their name. Doggie puddle on the carpet? I can tell you which of my three dogs did the dirty deed, based on the smell alone. You’re thinking about making broccoli for dinner? I will strangle you! Or at least run to the bathroom to vomit…

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Nausea is almost guaranteed.

You don’t have to be an HSP to be plagued by nausea during your pregnancy, but because HSPs “over-process” stimuli, your nausea may be more easily triggered. Not just by actual smells or foods, but by the mere thought of them — as well as by physical or visual stimuli, or even sounds. While pregnant, I would start feeling queasy minutes before getting on the subway in the summer. (So many armpits near my face!) To make matters worse, most herbal teas that could settle your stomach are off limits during pregnancy and breastfeeding. 

Who’s emotional?

You thought you were emotional before getting pregnant? HSPs feel everything deeply, but add hormones, stress and, oh, only the biggest life-changing event ever to the mix… yeah, you get the picture. You won’t necessarily be a “mess,” but expect your skin to get even thinner. While I usually rock a poker face (or what you could call RBF…), when pregnant, I would bawl a lot. So much love, so much anticipation, so many hormones — I was raw. Baby animals on TV (especially baby elephants — weeee!), lullabies, reading I Love You Because You’re You: waterworks! Not that that’s a bad thing, but “old me” was a little embarrassed of “pregnant me.” 

You’ll be very tired.

Being an HSP can be exhausting because we are easily overstimulated. (We aren’t lazy; we really do need more sleep.) And, as you can imagine, growing a little human inside you is hard work. Caring for a newborn is even harder. Essentially, you’ll be “working for two” and opportunities for rest will become rare. You will be TIRED like never before. 

Expect discomfort and, yes, pain.

When my worst nausea was finally over, moving or resting comfortably was getting harder and harder due to my growing bump. Unfortunately, HSPs have a lower tolerance for aches and pains. Can you imagine feeling the pain of labor and childbirth more than the average woman? I had no desire to and opted for drugs; the pain I felt once the anesthesia wore off was bad enough, even with painkillers!

Okay, whew! Are you completely discouraged now? Please don’t be. Parenthood is worth it, and no HSP should feel like they “can’t do it” because of their sensitivity. You just need a plan of attack.

6 Secrets to Pregnancy for HSPs

1. You can ask for consideration (for yourself and your baby).

HSPs tend to struggle with people pleasing and avoid rocking the boat. But no one who’s worth your time will hold it against you if you ask them (nicely) to make slight adjustments for you while you’re pregnant or nursing. Go ahead and ask for a seat on the totally-full subway. Take breaks at work. Have people smoke their cigarette somewhere else (yes, you have the right to request this!). Your health, as well as your baby’s, are worth someone else’s minor inconvenience.

2. You’re not crazy.

When you become a parent, you see the world differently. Your instinct kicks in and you become hyper-aware of potential risks for the safety of your child. In combination with all the other changes in your life and body, this can become overwhelming. Since HSPs are hyper-aware and easily overwhelmed to begin with, new HSP parents may feel tense and under pressure a lot. This doesn’t mean you’re crazy or being “difficult.” It means the people around you need to be considerate and supportive during this special time. And it means you need to take good care of yourself. (If you’re experiencing severe anxiety or symptoms of depression, please speak with your primary care doctor.)

3. You need self-care.

Stress, sleep deprivation and emotions are an issue for all pregnant women and new parents. For HSPs, who are especially sensitive, it can get very serious. Make rest a priority — and get as much “you time” as possible. As an HSP, you may need to withdraw from time to time in order to stay sane. If laundry and dishes are piling up, so be it: a messy house is not a safety hazard. Being a zombie is. 

This is a special time. You created life! Now be good to yourself and cut yourself lots of slack. (Here are some great self-care ideas if you need them).

4. You deserve support and respect.

Not everyone has family nearby or can afford paid help, but if it’s at all possible, outsource as many chores as you can. And turn to friends where needed: HSPs tend to take care of everyone, but now it’s time for everyone to take care of you so you can focus on your baby. 

Yes, that also means that demanding bosses and overbearing family members need to back off and respect your needs and wishes (read up on how to set boundaries when you’re an HSP). 

5. Your pain is real!

You aren’t whiny or “weak,” you are more sensitive to pain than the average person. Doctors, nurses and family members need to understand that and make adjustments. This is the 21st century — no one should have to suffer needlessly during or after giving birth, and you don’t have to “toughen up” (nor is pregnancy the right time to try to do that). 

Likewise, once you’re ready, you should be able to enjoy pain-free sex. Do not suffer in silence and don’t let people tell you you “should” be fine if you’re not. Speak to your partner — and your doctor — if something hurts, and be clear that you need solutions. 

Only you can tell how you feel. If you have a hard time speaking up for yourself, have someone advocate for you. A spouse, a friend, or a doula are good candidates for the job.

6. Know thyself.

Be aware of your your needs as an HSP. If you can identify any challenges parenthood may bring ahead of time, you can make a plan and embrace the changes coming your way. 

More than anything: Embrace who you are and the journey of bringing a life into this world. While pregnancy and parenthood come with additional challenges for HSPs, we make great parents thanks to our nurturing nature, our dependability, and our rich inner world. The joy your little one will bring you is worth it. And, as an HSP, you’ll feel that joy more keenly than anyone. 

You might like:

• How I Survived a Traumatic Pregnancy as a Highly Sensitive Person
• 6 Critical Self-Care Tips for Highly Sensitive New Moms
• What Happens When a Highly Sensitive Person Grows Up with Emotional Neglect?

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The post How to Survive Pregnancy as a Highly Sensitive Person appeared first on Sensitive Refuge.